Convert the Infidel
It would appear that I am a high-priority target. Who, might you ask, is training their careful sites on my rather large and bulbous head? The Jehovah Witnesses, thats who! Ever since I debated two of them on Noah’s Ark and evolution about 3 months ago I have been receiving periodic pamphlets on my door. Of course I would much rather just debate face to face, but I guess they have chosen a different route, and today they pulled out the big guns, their BFG 9000 so to speak.
The packet I received today had 3 items; an annotated version of the Gospel of John, a leaflet entitled “Are You a Good Person?” (according to the pamphlet I am not), and … get ready… a small booklet called “The Atheist’s Worst Nightmare”. First off, I made it rather clear to them when we spoke that I am a skeptic, I will not commit to a religion, or any system of belief without proper scientific, and logical evidence and therefore on matters of the supernatural I must remain agnostic, no matter how appealing they might be to my emotions. Apparently to the JW’s, anything but died-in-the-wool belief is atheism. Go figure. Anyway, prepare yourself to meet the atheist’s worst nightmare:
Yes, a banana. You are undoubtedly as dumb-founded as I am. I will know present to you the exact words from the booklet:
"Note that the banana:
1. Is shaped for the human hand
2. Has non-slip surface.
3. Has outward indicators of inward contents: yellow=good, green=too early, black=bad
4. Has a tab for the removal of wrapper.
5. Is perforated on wrapper.
6. Bio-degradable wrapper.
7. Is shaped for human mouth.
8. Has point at top for ease of entry.
9. Is pleasing to taste buds.
10. Is curved towards face to make eating process easy.
To say that the banana happened by accident is even more unintelligent than to say that no one designed the Coca Cola can."
Still dumbfounded? I know I sure am. While this is the absolute dumbest argument for the existence of God I have ever read in my life, I am even more floored by the stupidity of the author. 5 minutes of simple research would confirm that not only do most bananas fail to meet his criteria, but the 'banana' as we know it is the product of artificial selection, a human driven varient which works on the principals of natural selection! The following picture is what a truly wild banana looks like:
A pod with little flesh and a mass of seeds. Our modern bananas are the product of selective breeding by humans to choose for the genetic traits which we like in our bananas (basic Mendelian genetics). God didn't design the banana, humans did! The author's ignorance here is blinding and really makes me wonder how people get away with stuff like this. I also can't help but wonder if we follow the authors logic to its necessary end, if mushrooms which look edible, but are really poisonous are proof that God hates us and wants us to die. Maybe pineapples are proof that God wants us to be frustrated, or as Ben Franklin said, 'beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy', of course the stupid examples are endless.
If there is a God out there somewhere I have no doubt he is smacking his metaphorical forehead over this one.
Unfortunately the 'banana argument' is not the only one in my little booklet, I will be exploring more of these little gems shortly!
The packet I received today had 3 items; an annotated version of the Gospel of John, a leaflet entitled “Are You a Good Person?” (according to the pamphlet I am not), and … get ready… a small booklet called “The Atheist’s Worst Nightmare”. First off, I made it rather clear to them when we spoke that I am a skeptic, I will not commit to a religion, or any system of belief without proper scientific, and logical evidence and therefore on matters of the supernatural I must remain agnostic, no matter how appealing they might be to my emotions. Apparently to the JW’s, anything but died-in-the-wool belief is atheism. Go figure. Anyway, prepare yourself to meet the atheist’s worst nightmare:
Yes, a banana. You are undoubtedly as dumb-founded as I am. I will know present to you the exact words from the booklet:
"Note that the banana:
1. Is shaped for the human hand
2. Has non-slip surface.
3. Has outward indicators of inward contents: yellow=good, green=too early, black=bad
4. Has a tab for the removal of wrapper.
5. Is perforated on wrapper.
6. Bio-degradable wrapper.
7. Is shaped for human mouth.
8. Has point at top for ease of entry.
9. Is pleasing to taste buds.
10. Is curved towards face to make eating process easy.
To say that the banana happened by accident is even more unintelligent than to say that no one designed the Coca Cola can."
Still dumbfounded? I know I sure am. While this is the absolute dumbest argument for the existence of God I have ever read in my life, I am even more floored by the stupidity of the author. 5 minutes of simple research would confirm that not only do most bananas fail to meet his criteria, but the 'banana' as we know it is the product of artificial selection, a human driven varient which works on the principals of natural selection! The following picture is what a truly wild banana looks like:
A pod with little flesh and a mass of seeds. Our modern bananas are the product of selective breeding by humans to choose for the genetic traits which we like in our bananas (basic Mendelian genetics). God didn't design the banana, humans did! The author's ignorance here is blinding and really makes me wonder how people get away with stuff like this. I also can't help but wonder if we follow the authors logic to its necessary end, if mushrooms which look edible, but are really poisonous are proof that God hates us and wants us to die. Maybe pineapples are proof that God wants us to be frustrated, or as Ben Franklin said, 'beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy', of course the stupid examples are endless.
If there is a God out there somewhere I have no doubt he is smacking his metaphorical forehead over this one.
Unfortunately the 'banana argument' is not the only one in my little booklet, I will be exploring more of these little gems shortly!
Labels: Bad Argument
posted by Joel at
6:13 PM
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